The feeling of failure is so deeply wired in us as being “wrong” or “bad” that it keeps us from playing, experimenting, trying new things. We are wired to think in black and white, in safety in numbers, in not sticking out of the crowd by being the anomaly.
Fear is a funny thing. As much as you want it to go away, it actually reveals your underlying beliefs. When you fear something, you deeply (probably unconsciously) believe that something has the power to hurt you. Whether it’s a spider, falling from a height, or being left by a man that you have opened yourself up to, or even being left alone in the world while everyone else is busy with their families.
One might think that a lack of something means there's less to think about, less to worry about, but in fact negative space leaves a tremendous space for anxiety. Worry about what's missing... like an unfulfilled hunger or an indefinite wait for something essential.
It’s hard enough to navigate through life and all its emotions, challenges, losses and frustrations without having to also be the best version of you in your work, family, friendships and still manage to come out feeling accomplished, creative and free.
We have this fabricated notion etched into our brains that work and real life are all about discomfort, and holiday and breaks are all about comfort. We have this notion implanted into us that real work entails production and generating financial capital, and deep inner work is a luxury afforded to those who have earned the freedom to play after putting in their time, across a lifetime or even generations.
I won’t lie, working for yourself, and by yourself, really isn’t for everyone. Self motivation is just the start of the list of tools you've got to have in your back pocket to make it work.
Each of us gets to have only the tiniest slice of the experience that is known as life on earth as a human being. And we cling so tightly to our own version of the world, afraid it might prove to be false, that we constantly confirm with others on our path if they've had the same experience, just to reassure ourselves that our version of life is true, reliable, fact.
I’m on the edge between reality and insanity. Does the world really exist or have I made it all up? I’ve always been on the edge — always. It's the edge between fear and fascination.
I’m standing at the very bottom of a deep and dark valley. Deep. Dark. Vast. I feel tiny. I know where I came from, the mountain I scaled to get here looms behind me, so far in the distance now, it's dwarved by time.
I used to try and fit in, and stand out at the same time. I learnt how to dress, talk and work in a way that let me do them both. I adapted the way I presented myself based on who I was meeting and what I wanted them to think about me. I created an identity for myself that made most people wish they could be me. Even me.
I did it because not doing it wasn't good enough, was a regret I didn’t want to live with
I did it so that in any moment that I died, I could feel fulfilled and complete I did it because it made me feel alive
Do you have to quit your job and chase your dream just to live a life of meaning and fulfilment? How do we find passion and creativity in our lives without risking it all? Can’t we just have it ALL? Passion and creativity comes in many different forms but is absolutely essential for feeling fulfilled as a human being.
We live in a world where you are known for what you believe in, and as you get closer to your own truth, you may lose some people along the way. This is actually great. Who wants followers or friends that don’t believe in us, anyway?
Do you wish you could follow your dreams and live a life of passion, but you’re not sure you can pull it off? Here’s how I learnt to commit to my own success by paying attention to this one thing.
I’ve made a new friend. We used to be at odds. He would taunt me, annoy me, make me doubt myself. Sometimes to the point of insanity.