WITH MEANING & FULFILMENT
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personal development
What do you do in a world that demands your submission just so you can stay alive? What do you do when your job and your paycheck demand that you keep doing more, and more and more? How can you stop in a culture that thrives on you exploiting yourself completely?
This is how: You change the culture.
Most of us are living in fear of our darker emotions. And why wouldn’t we, when our culture and media are telling us that our ideal state is one of constantly being happy and productive? And if we aren’t, then hey, here’s a solution to help you BECOME constantly happy and productive.
Perfectionism is an artificially created disease of constant doing. A delusion that we as humans have a godlike purpose to create a world that doesn’t already exist. An obsessive belief that we are here to fix something that isn’t broken.
I know you’re probably busy working or getting to the end of your day, but I invite you to take a few minutes to slack off, and read this. Go ahead, slack off for 8 minutes.
Today, as I was scratching my cat behind his ears, I realised that the expression of love is simply care — offering care in a way that helps, nurtures or pleasures someone. Which means that if I do things that don't help, nurture or pleasure my own self, then I am not acting out of love for myself.
We are stuck in a vicious cycle in society.
We don’t let ourselves be vulnerable to each other because we don’t trust each other to not hurt us. And we don’t trust each other because we don’t trust ourselves to take care of ourselves.
The first time I gave myself the gift of 10 days silent meditation, I came undone. I went in to simply test my own self discipline — but while there, I experienced the dissolution of everything that I believed to be real. The very physical reality of my own body, but also my sense of my own identity, all revealed itself to be a very convincing illusion.
Ultimately, when you’re depressed, you are mourning your past. You are reliving some part of your life, and all of the emotions that came with it. You are mourning what has already happened, and your inability to change it.
It has been a year of community and consideration. A year of contemplation and connection.
My commitment has been to myself, yet along the way I have collected infinitely valuable wisdom from the beautiful wise souls I met along the way. With humble gratitude, I dedicate this year in review to each one of you, you know who you are.
I believe we have the potential to evolve to our higher consciousness as beings — if we just find the courage to go through our emotions, fears, ecstasies and desires, instead of around them.
What does it really mean to be human?
What makes a coach really good, or even great? Maybe it’s experience as a designer. Especially in branding and identity. A good coach knows how to listen for what matters to you, and reflect it back to you in a way that makes your heart feel a deep-seated recognition of yourself, jumping out of your seat to say, “Yes, exactly! That’s me! You got me. That’s what I want."
I’ve always been a goal oriented person. I learnt how to decide what to focus on, and then focus on it so pointedly, blocking out all distractions until the goal had been achieved. Only to move onto the next goal.You can read a ton of articles about how positive thinking helps you become more productive, and it’s true — focusing on what you can change and ignoring what you can’t is a great way to make progress without distraction.
The feeling of failure is so deeply wired in us as being “wrong” or “bad” that it keeps us from playing, experimenting, trying new things. We are wired to think in black and white, in safety in numbers, in not sticking out of the crowd by being the anomaly.
Fear is a funny thing. As much as you want it to go away, it actually reveals your underlying beliefs. When you fear something, you deeply (probably unconsciously) believe that something has the power to hurt you. Whether it’s a spider, falling from a height, or being left by a man that you have opened yourself up to, or even being left alone in the world while everyone else is busy with their families.
One might think that a lack of something means there's less to think about, less to worry about, but in fact negative space leaves a tremendous space for anxiety. Worry about what's missing... like an unfulfilled hunger or an indefinite wait for something essential.
It’s hard enough to navigate through life and all its emotions, challenges, losses and frustrations without having to also be the best version of you in your work, family, friendships and still manage to come out feeling accomplished, creative and free.
I’m standing at the very bottom of a deep and dark valley. Deep. Dark. Vast. I feel tiny. I know where I came from, the mountain I scaled to get here looms behind me, so far in the distance now, it's dwarved by time.
I used to try and fit in, and stand out at the same time. I learnt how to dress, talk and work in a way that let me do them both. I adapted the way I presented myself based on who I was meeting and what I wanted them to think about me. I created an identity for myself that made most people wish they could be me. Even me.
Do you have to quit your job and chase your dream just to live a life of meaning and fulfilment? How do we find passion and creativity in our lives without risking it all? Can’t we just have it ALL? Passion and creativity comes in many different forms but is absolutely essential for feeling fulfilled as a human being.
We live in a world where you are known for what you believe in, and as you get closer to your own truth, you may lose some people along the way. This is actually great. Who wants followers or friends that don’t believe in us, anyway?
